A few weeks ago now I made the decision to stop breastfeeding. I had been feeling like I wanted to stop for a little while because I was having a lot of trouble producing enough milk for my daughter (1/4 an ounce from one side, 1/2 - 1 ounce on the other in a pumping session), pumping at work was stressful for a number of reasons, and in a lot of ways it felt more like a chore than something I truly enjoyed. I did, however, enjoy the ease of feeding my daughter at night and of course the health benefits for my daughter. What pushed me over the edge was that I (once again) forgot an important piece of my breast pump and had to leave work to go and get it. It was just the last straw. Pumping was too much of a pain in the ass, and I just couldn't take it anymore.
Now, I know there are mother's out there who will be appalled at my doing and saying all of this, and to you I say: to each their own. I breastfed my daughter for five and a half months, and I'm proud of that! My daughter is happy and healthy, and I am happy and healthy, and that's all that should matter.
Despite my not really wanting to breastfeed anymore (and in a lot of ways my inability to breastfeed) I was still a little heart broken when I stopped. I felt guilt and sadness! I found myself missing when I breastfed her. Only once has she tried to breastfeed since I stopped (when she was starving and I was warming up a bottle) and it broke my heart that I couldn't - I almost cried. But, other than that ... I feel so happy and free! FREE! I can go out for hours at a time and not have to worry about pumping or engorgement or my milk supply. It's wonderful! I've gotten over the initial sadness, and I am so happy to no longer be breastfeeding.
My advice to moms out there who are thinking of weaning their babies, here is my advice to you:
1) Make sure you are truly ready, and even if you are, be prepared to feel a little sad. If you are on the fence, just wait until you have finally found that moment that pushes you over onto one side or the other. Don't stop if you are unsure! Breastfeed for as long as it makes you happy to do so, and then walk away from it. A happy mom using formula is better than an unhappy mom who is breastfeeding.
2) Read up on how to stop breastfeeding. Don't go cold turkey, ease into it. The more you produce the more slowly you should wean off breastfeeding. And prepare for discomfort and even pain. Get some advil or tylenol and some lettuce leaves ready. Don't wean your baby off when you are about to go on a trip or some other big event that might throw your baby for an even bigger loop than they might already be going through.
3) Celebrate! Once you have stopped do something you couldn't while you were breastfeeding to make you feel good about the change even when you might be a little sad. Perhaps go to a bar with some friends, or see a movie and go to dinner. Enjoy the freedom of having your body to yourself for the first time since you became pregnant.
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